Time to Go, Baybeeeeeeeee

I'm probably the last person I know to give up on Dick Vitale, but enough's enough. My friends have been bitching bout hm for a long time and I was always like awww, he's just excited et al. Plus when it comes to announcers I generally prefer ones that started announcing in 1919, I get grouchy about broadcasting changeups. If it were up to me, every game would be called by Mike Patrick and Dan Bonner. Al McGuire calling in from the grave during breaks in the action.

I didn't have ESPN until I went to college, so I never even really heard him doing a game until then. I had no idea he had done games for ESPN for ten years. So a coupla weeks ago I flipped to ESPN Classic to check out whatever games they were showing, and I landed on the 1983 ACC Final (Ralph's final league game.) I'm watching the game, and it wasn't until about 10 minutes in I was like hold up...is that Dicky V? He was so calm, just doing his job, letting the game breathe (as Mad Dog would say.) And he was right on about everything...the complete opposite of the hyperventilating cartoon fuckmuppet he has become. Now, thorughout the weeks I've checked in from time to time, and it's always the same thing. There was always an excitement from him now and again, but nothing crazy, nothing over-the-top. I just saw the final 2 minutes of the 1996 Duke/Carolina game, won in the final seconds by a tip-in and Dicky V's excitement level, while cranked up pretty high for the time, doesn't even crack the register when compared to if he was on camera today opening a box of Raisin Nut Bran Cereal 'OMYGOD BAYBEE I'M GOING WILD WITH THIS IT'S RAISINS AND BRAN AND YES I AM NUTS BAYBEE THIS IS AWESOME BABEE OH CRAP I AM CHOKING ON MY SPOON THIS IS NOT SO AWESOME BAYBEE!!!!!!!!!!" If the Duke/UNC game this weekend had a finish like that our guy would chop his own head off and kick it into the stands before setting himself on fire while shitting out a Shane Battier kewpie doll he's been "SAVING FOR A SPECIAL OCCASION, BAYBEEEEEEEE!!!!" For fuck's sake. He has to go. It's too much; he was great at one time for the game but now makes any game he's covering UNWATCHABLE. He's beomce those huge soundsystems cranking out noise between every pitch at baseball games that drive you fucking insane. I don't care if he goes around on different shows "being Dicky V", but please, no more doing games. Sorry, Dicky V. NEXT!!!!