I've Struck Gold

Body dysmorphic disorder is a (psychological) Somatoform disorder in which the affected person is excessively concerned about and preoccupied by a perceived defect in his or her physical features.

I've stumbled upon the Body Dysmorphic Disorder episode of True Life on MTV, and I gotta say, I think I've found a winner in the "Low Self-Esteem Mrs. Xmastime Olympics." I mean, these chicks are all smoking hot, but have the self esteem of my cripples and stutterers and would be just as grateful that I would even give them the time of day. And the best part is that BY DEFINITION they're hot - after all, if they're ugly and bitching about how ugly they are it's like yeah, well, you're ugly, what do you want me to say.

I feel like these girls have been sent to me from God. Where might I find one?

"You are an ugly bitch, but I still love you, baby."