On the train tonight I came across this passage from
Lost Memory of Skin:
...when you decide to kill yourself you also get the chance to choose the method and therefore how you kill yourself in a sense can reveal who you really are...it is like a form of self-expression, your true last words.
Apparently my last words would be "hey, look at me! I'm an asshole!!"
If I was going to kill myself, I assure you no one would find me in some linen closet or some shit. If I'm going out, I'm fucking parachuting into the middle of the goddam Super Bowl, setting myself on fire and then blowing my fucking brains out. At least be interesting. But some small town, finding me in the fields? Oh, hell no.
I also wondered
HERE;
Remember that woman a coupla months ago who was counting down the days til she killed herself and wrote a daily blog about it? I think she started at like Day 80, and counted down. I have no idea what happened, if she actually did it or not. But my point is, I’m gonna do that now. Let’s face it – anybody’s gonna be committing suicide, it should be me right. So what the fuck, might as well do the deed myself and make it entertaining.
Maybe I'll film me doing it, make it a Fireside Chat, have the camera going? Guess it doesn’t really matter. She did what, 80 days? I’ll be honest – that’s a little soon for me. But I do like the round numbers. I think what’s more important right now than any of the specifics is that I’ve committed myself to doing it, right? Pick a date, countdown, have some laughs, goodbye. So my next post will start the actual countdown. The title will be the number of the day I’m counting down from, and I’ll post every day leading up to the event. I already miss you guys!!!
Does anyone know what happened to that woman? I posted it on May 9, 2008. Creepy if she actually did it, right? Yeesh. I don't wanna look.
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