Happy Birthday, Curly.

Although it'll be depressing to have to face the idea that I'm ten years older than the King of England, I want Prince William to become King because I think the name "King William" is pretty hardcore. Nothing against Charles, but camon. King William had Stephen King, who burned my ass around end twice for about 788 yards each, and I also poured in over half of our teams points in a game on the hardwood.

Obviously, him becoming King (with his Queen that I wantsta buckingham) is being set up to perfectly coincide with my arrival in England in July of 2012. I'm looking forward to becoming his BFF!!  (although  repeatedly tea-ing his wife's crumpets, hopefully from behind, will eventually make things awkward for us. And that's makes me sad...but we'll cross that London Bridge when we get to it, and if I give a shit, which isn't bloody likely.) - XMASTIME

Oh, goody: Prince William, my once and future rival for the affections of Kate Middleton, turns thirty today and inherits another sack of millions of dollars.  Oh, goody: MORE good news for the prince! Awesome! I was gettng worried it'd been more than 45 seconds since his last round of great news!!!!!

I'll give him today to celebrate, but then our regularly scheduled competition will resume.  A warning to the prince: I just bought new towels for the first time since 1998. I'm not saying that means the game is over, but if I was him I'd be thinking about getting a Costanzian wig.