Are You Fucking Shitting Me?

Moi, in December of 2006:

1) Who’s the fucking wizard at ABC who, at the Christmas movie scheduling meeting, came up with kicking things off by showing "A Charlie Brown Christmas" on November 28? What the fuck? THE number one Christmas show to watch, Xmas nostalgia rivaled only by "It’s a Wonderful Life", and you know what…why don’t we get this thing outta the way before December even hits so we can make room for new classics like "Christmas at the Mall 3" and "Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer (The Quickening)"? Who signed off on this – I looked and saw that tv has over 75 Xmas movies to fucking show in the next month; how the FUCK could the Charlie Brown one not be the goddam climax to all this?!?!?!?! Why is this not shown on Xmas Eve? Should be the "Christmas Story" marathon up til 7:30, then Charlie Brown followed by "It’s a Wonderful Life", bam! Christmas!!! Who even watches these other steaming piles they throw out every year? I’m baffled. November 28??!!?! Are you kidding me? I can live with them kicking off the Xmas season early, but why not save the best for last instead of vice versa? This is like fucking Jessica Alba before you’re even horny or hard so that you can hurry up and get to jerking off to the Sears catalog. 

Here we are, AGAIN on a November 28, 6 years later, and guess what's coming on tonight? Just the other day I was lauding the powers that be for actually showing the Thanksgiving special the day before you know, Thanksgiving. and yet they're fucking scratching the Christmas classic off their list before November's even out. AGAIN!!!!!!

Good fucking grief.

SIDE NOTE: also great in the linked Things are Good is my classic black people are scared of dogs but not me riff. Sigh.