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Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Marine Dumb

I was watching some doc the other day, I think it was about the White House, and they talked about Marine One, the helicopter that takes the President around town (mostly to Air Force One) so they don't hafta pop out a motorcade and clog up the city every time the Prez wants some taquitos from 7-11.

One thing I never realized before is that for security reasons, whenever they're flying Marine 1 they always fly ANOTHER one alongside it as a decoy. Not only that, but the helicopters cut back and forth on each other, constantly changing who's where in whatever random formation they're in. For security, of course. Cause I guess there's nothing safer than two 15-ton metal boxes with 61-foot long spinning metal blades bobbing and weaving and circling within a few feet of each other like 3 year-olds playing soccer. Christ.

And two seems superfluous anyway, no? I mean, if I have my shit so together that I can get ONE missile or whatever shot at one of these things, wouldn't you think I could shoot TWO if I wanted? If I can get that close to popping one off at the President, I'd like to think I would've had the foresight to take about 4 seconds to do a little research online and realize "ok, I need to bring TWO Russet baking potatoes. Got it!"

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