Republican Mightily Pats Self On Back for Being Totally Cool With Senator Publicly Admitting Black Man Not An Arab That One Time.

Questions. I Have Them.

Is there a documentary about the history of the Indiana/Kentucky high school all-stars basketball game?

RIP Neil Simon

Happy Birthday Joe Strummer

TFW Some Skinny Mofo Takes the Bigger of the Last Two Slices of Pizza:

Elvis Presley January 8, 1935 - August 16, 1977

State du Moi

The only mature thing about me is that I never think it's funny when someone says the word "duty."

THAT FEELING WHEN YOU FIND LEFTOVER CHINESE FOOD YOU DIDN'T KNOW YOU HAD:

OBX 2018

Too much fun, too much sun, I miss y’all already.

Mickey Me's

If you’ve ever had any doubts about me being McDonald's favorite you can stop wondering now.

2018.

After listening to a group of girls aged 6-8 talk about nothing but poop & pooping for 20 minutes I feel like I should be way more confidant about approaching women in bars.

Fall is the Shizzle

The Atlantic re-posted an article from a year ago re: why Fall feels like the real start of a year:

Why does autumn, which could reasonably be considered as foreshadowing only the dark days of winter, feel like a beginning? And could it actually be beneficial to think of the back-to-school window as its own kind of new year—even if our classroom days are behind us?

“Add up all of those years and you’re talking roughly half of one’s lifespan being tied to an academic calendar,” Schneider said. “That powerfully shapes the way people experience what the ‘beginning’ and ‘end’ of the year is.”

"But Xmastime", you say in the voice of Craig “Ironhead” Heyward from those soap commercials (RIP), “didn't you say all this 11 years ago?"

Sigh. Yes I did, Faithful Readers. Yes I did:

I think we can all knock off the nonsense about “spring is about rebirth!” that we love to throw around and believe. As with the stupidity of clinging to voting on Tuesdays, I know this crap is from our days as an agrarian society. But isn’t fall more about rebirth than spring? Schools re-open. Most people get back to serious work after a long summer of vacations/slacking off etc. Football, hockey and basketball seasons begin in the fall. The crisp autumnal air gives us fresh energy after a summer of trying to sleep in our own sweat. Fall kicks off the holiday season. Networks roll out their new seasons. Everything starts for real after Labor Day. What the fuck does spring start? Wow, leaves come back on the trees. Whoop-de do shit. Otherwise, it kicks off months and months of hot, dreary nothingness. So let’s give fall it’s due for once this year as it rolls in. And Spring? Go fuck yourself.

NEW JOB!

Offices may come and offices may go, but there always remains one constant.