Dean Wermer: your SATs are amazing, your GPA is a 4.0 and you were in every extracurricular activity at your high school.
Kid: That's right.
Dean Wermer: you have a letter of recommendation from Lee Iacocca.
Kid: That's right.
Dean Wermer: So lemme ask you something...what noise does a sheep make?
Kid: (draws complete blank)
Dean Wermer: I see. Hmm. Yeah, I'll keep your application on file (deposits into paper shredder, kid walks out and into the world of community college.)
And then another thing I don't like is that in every book, there's a big fat snake that's supposed to be friendly. Hey look, fluffy happy puppy looking for a hug. A sweet duck looking to help, splashing around. Oh, and sliding down from a tree? A 19-foot long boa that looks like it just swallowed a golf cart. What the fuck? Oh, but the snake is supposed to cute and cuddly and just wants to be "one of the guys!"
I don't want my little guys to be scared of snakes. But I don't want them thinking it's okay to go up and fucking hug one either, you know? Wtf. Why not have "happy, jolly drug dealers" too? Drippy chlamydia-riled Mexican with open sores? Just wants a hug, wants to be friends! Camon!!!!
"Heeeeeeeeeeey buddy! Come a lil closer, I just wanna be good friends! That's it...liiiiiiiiiiiiiittle bit closer..."
2 comments:
This reminds me of an insipidly fruity commercial playing at the movie theatre, just before Ironman when on. It was for Huggies. A cartoon done in pastel rainbow colors. It's a band made up of animals with toilets and bathroom fixtures for bodies, playing and singing the praises of a clean butt. Seriously. Dancing around the bathroom, with the Huggies logo in lights. Ew.
At the end of the song they have all of the product displayed including the plastic box of wipies.
if we had to watch a diaper commercial, this one would have been cuter.
http://www.msplinks.com/MDFodHRwOi8vd3d3LnlvdXR1YmUuY29tL3dhdGNoP3Y9WUdRRlExa2k1YUU=
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