Is there anything more awkward than when you walk out of your apartment
to leave the building and as you're walking down the hallway, someone
else on your floor pops out into the hallway, and you see each other,
and you're the one that's closer to the door and so now you gotta
fucking figure out if the two of you are far apart enough where you can
just cruise on down without worrying about being polite and holding the
door, or if you're at a distance where society dictates you slow down
and do the ol' hold the door open routine? Ugh. Brutal. Just happened to
me, and I used the "slow down while looking as if you're still walking
the same speed so they can close the gap and it's a natural hold the
door open, not a stand there for a few seconds holding the door open
with an outstretched arm looking like a douche hold the door open"
choice. So I hold the door open, he walks through with an "oh, thanks!"
And we start walking, me two steps ahead the whole time, and we have two
more doors to go. Now's the part that drives me bananas - he has to do
the dance where he thanks me at EVERY door. "Oh, thanks!" Hey fuckwad,
it's bad enough you have to thank me every time, you certainly don't
have to act surprised each time too. "Oh, thanks!!" Like, you know,
"oh, you're still here? 14 inches in front of me? Great!" For fuck's
sake. I know society dictates he thank me each time, and I would do the
same, but between that and the original door decision, that's a lot of
fucking brainwork for 47 fucking steps. Man.
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