The Key to Moi, by Xmastime

In my building we don't have keys for any of the doors, it's all on a phone app funk you people very much, which obviously is yet another thing that makes me better than you, and only once a week do I truck downstairs with the one key I have left in my life to check my mailbox.

Walking back up to my doorway after returning from my mailbox just now I felt myself absentmindedly, instinctively reaching for my key, which I thought to be very interesting, so now you tell me does that make me:

1) old af
2) old af but very interesting
3) locked out of my apartment

?